#1113

The keys have been turned in. The door locked behind me. The place that started my freedom. Apartment #1113. 

I am only slightly melancholy that we moved. That place was tiny, and we had outgrown the space since our family had grown from 4 ladies roughing it, to a family of five with a man of the house. 

What I want to write tonight is about what that apartment meant for me. It was the key that GOD handed me and told me to be free. Let go of the past. Let go of the rage, the hate, the abuse, that you see everyday. Just be free. Most of the people who know me, know that I hate change. I also hate to give up on things. I read an article the other day that helped me maybe let go of any failure I had left. It talked about people who are married and whether or not it was on paper, or a covenant of GOD. For me, there was no covenant. I tried very hard to make things work. 3 kids, 6 months of counseling, begging and pleading, emotionally cheating, and 14 years later, I let it go. I looked for an apartment. The doors opened, we found a place, and I got the keys. 

I found a pamphlet in my new home a week after me and my girls moved. I know that God put it there. Whether he had a friend leave it, or a family member leave it. Doesn’t matter now. Just matters that I read it. That I took a good look at the list of ways to tell you were in an abusive relationship.

I checked too many of those boxes that day. I promised myself that I wouldn’t be treated that way ever again. I would be first, I would be important. I would be chased, wanted, loved. Cared for, respected. Everything that a woman deserves. 

Saying goodbye to the old apartment was a step forward. It meant freedom for me and my girls. Our new place, it means home. We are a complete little family. I have more than I ever imagined that I deserved, more than I could have thought to ask for. I know it. I am grateful for it.  

I give everyone woman out there this little bit of hope. If you have struggles. You are in the land of the single mom. Whether you are the single mom who is married (that was most of my marriage) or the one that has ventured out and has bravely set forth to find your freedom. Be of great joy. You are amazing! You can do it! You may not find prince or princess charming. But you are a joy, an amazing creation that GOD made, and he will lead you. 

So tonight, as I get ready to put the kiddoes to bed, as I reach out to say my prayers, I pray for each of you. All of you in whatever your struggle is. Be blessed. God loves you, as a fellow human I love you. Reach out and be free. No relationship should place you in chains. 

 

All my love always,

Lady X

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